I age and become crotchety
There's not much I mind about getting older. I have good reason for that. Honestly, I'm in better physical condition than I was 20 years ago. I'm healthier, eat something resembling a balanced diet and no longer treat my waking hours as an exercise in debauchery.
That's not to say that I didn't enjoy myself 20 years ago (I did say "debauchery," right?). But my lifestyle was ... ummm ... not sustainable for the long haul. I mean, I don't have access to the cyborg technology that keeps Keith Richards going.
I have many fond memories, though. Well ... some of them are actually based on stories told me about my actions after the fact. I can't remember everything I did.
But there are certainly some aspects of aging that I could do without. For starters, I don't bounce back the way I once did. I used to stay out drinking and snorting until all hours, take a pratfall down a flight of stairs, get my injuries clucked over by some stray woman who took me home for a little TLC, and then go to work in the morning. Oh, but I would wear sunglasses in the office because I had a bit of a hangover. Tough life.
Now I stay up late to watch a movie, have an extra glass of wine, and feel like death warmed over the next day.
Of course, we don't appreciate our resilience when we're young. My kid had strep last week -- not that you'd have known it to look at him. He bounced around, did somersaults, wrestled with his cousins ...
But one day, he had a little cough. My wife, the doctor, figured it wouldn't hurt to run a strep test on him this time of year. Sure enough, the culture came back really positive. The bugs were swarming: line-dancing and having a party. But the kid didn't miss a beat.
Me? I'm running a 100-degree fever and I've been rotating between my bed and the sofa for three days.
Damned kids.
That's not to say that I didn't enjoy myself 20 years ago (I did say "debauchery," right?). But my lifestyle was ... ummm ... not sustainable for the long haul. I mean, I don't have access to the cyborg technology that keeps Keith Richards going.
I have many fond memories, though. Well ... some of them are actually based on stories told me about my actions after the fact. I can't remember everything I did.
But there are certainly some aspects of aging that I could do without. For starters, I don't bounce back the way I once did. I used to stay out drinking and snorting until all hours, take a pratfall down a flight of stairs, get my injuries clucked over by some stray woman who took me home for a little TLC, and then go to work in the morning. Oh, but I would wear sunglasses in the office because I had a bit of a hangover. Tough life.
Now I stay up late to watch a movie, have an extra glass of wine, and feel like death warmed over the next day.
Of course, we don't appreciate our resilience when we're young. My kid had strep last week -- not that you'd have known it to look at him. He bounced around, did somersaults, wrestled with his cousins ...
But one day, he had a little cough. My wife, the doctor, figured it wouldn't hurt to run a strep test on him this time of year. Sure enough, the culture came back really positive. The bugs were swarming: line-dancing and having a party. But the kid didn't miss a beat.
Me? I'm running a 100-degree fever and I've been rotating between my bed and the sofa for three days.
Damned kids.
posted by J.D. Tuccille at
9:48 AM
4 Comments:
Hope you're feeling better, JD.
I'm well enough to have done some roof repair today, but still sick enough to regret the effort. Thanks for asking!
Look on the bright side - soon enough you'll be able to stand around on street corners waving your walking stick and incoherently shouting abuse at passing teenagers. At least, it's what the oldsters do around here and it looks like they find it an entertaining way to pass the time. Well, that and Special Brew.
I'm getting there, Johnny. There aren't many trafficked street corners around me, but I can sit on the front patio drinking bourbon and glaring menacingly at the kids.
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